Dear Reader,
Today I found myself drawn to the subject of marriage. From past scripture study—and from my present effort to draw closer to our Heavenly Father—I offer the following thoughts.
Marriage, in its highest form, is not merely a union of two individuals—it is a divine covenant designed to transform the natural man into a spiritual being.
The Lord’s pattern has always pointed toward unity—not just companionship, but a unity that elevates, refines, and sanctifies. As taught in Genesis 2:24, “they shall be one flesh.” In my understanding, this unity is not only physical or emotional—it is spiritual alignment with God.
At its best, marriage becomes:
A protection against selfishness and isolation
A training ground for charity, patience, and forgiveness
A center where love is learned, tested, and deepened
But scripture also teaches why marriage sometimes falls short of this divine purpose.
The challenge is not in the institution itself, but in what the "Natural Man" brings into it.
The Book of Mormon teaches plainly:
Mosiah 3:19
“The natural man is an enemy to God…”
That same natural man does not disappear when we enter marriage—he comes with us.
When marriage is built on the “natural man”—on pride, appearance, passion, or self-interest—it becomes unstable. What was meant to be a source of harmony becomes a place of misunderstanding and disappointment.
Marriage has not failed—we are still learning what it is meant to become..
True marriage, in the Lord’s design, is part of the same journey described throughout scripture:
From self-centeredness → to selflessness
From temporary pleasure → to lasting joy
From natural affection → to Christlike love
Jesus Christ Himself defined this higher law:
John 15:13
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”
In marriage, this “laying down of life” rarely happens all at once.
It happens daily:
In choosing patience over irritation
In choosing understanding over judgment
In choosing to give when it would be easier to withdraw
This is why marriage is not simply about happiness—it is about becoming.
And yet, the promise remains that true happiness is found—but not where the world often looks for it.
The Book of Mormon reminds us:
2 Nephi 2:25
“Men are, that they might have joy.”
That joy is not found in outward things—appearance, status, or fleeting emotion—but in a life aligned with God.
When a marriage is rooted in that alignment:
Love becomes deeper than feeling
Unity becomes stronger than disagreement
And joy becomes more secure than circumstance
In this sense, marriage becomes something sacred:
Not just a relationship,
But a refining partnership—
Where two imperfect people,
learning to rely on God,
help one another become something neither could become alone.
Marriage is not meant to be perfect at the start.
It is meant to be perfecting.
And as we move—however slowly—from the natural man toward the spiritual life,
marriage becomes less about what we receive and more about what we are becoming together—
in the presence of God.
