The Smile that shines through Tears: Growth in Recovery and Grace

I was looking back to last year's Facebook entry and found tow quotes that I can add to today.  

" Patience is needed with everyone, but first of all with ourselves." –St. Francis de Sales  

  

" It IS EASY ENOUGH to be pleasant, when life flows by like a song, But the man worth while is one who will smile, when everything goes dead wrong. For the test of the heart is trouble, And it always comes with the years, And the smile that is worth the praises of earth Is the smile that shines through tears." Worthwhile. by Ella Wheeler Wilcox  

 

I reflect on these quotes for I find recovery isn't about perfect days.  It is about finding the strength to walk down an imperfect path as an imperfect self -- and still choose hope, faith and a trusting smile. 

 

As I entered recovery, I believe recovery would come quickly if I tried harder.  I quickly learned that one of the first lessons in recovery was that impatience with myself was its own kind of self-centeredness.  Bill Wilson reminds us that spiritual progress, not spiritual perfection, is the goal.  Patience with ourselves is one of the highest forms of humility.   

 

Moreover, just to complain about our troubles produced little solution to them.  However, acting as if and carrying a smile redirected old habits of "poor me" to habits of faith-based defiance were smiling through tears keep me sober. 

 

Even though my recovery at times does not feel like a blessing, it does provide me with the evidence that a power greater than myself does care about my life and is there for me in all troubles.  Bill Wilson also has said that our troubles could become are greatest teachers if we let them.  We learn to navigate intuitively it the various storms of life. 

 

Spiritually we learn that God's strength is made perfect in our weakness.  When I reach the end of my patience or when my heart breaks of loss, this is when there is room enough to allow grace to flow in.  Smiling through tears is not about faking it -- It is about trusting that I am being embraced by a beautiful power that will not let me fall.   

 

If you are in a season of struggle right now, remember patience with yourself is not laziness, and smiling through pain is not denial.  They are signs of a heart that is healing, a soul that is growing.  Keep going.  Keep smiling. You are becoming the person you were always meant to be. 

 

Supporting thoughts 

AA Recover thoughts 

"We are not saints.  The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines." AA Big Book p60 

 

"We have found that God does not make to hard terms with those who seek Him.  To us, the realm of the spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek." AA Bib Book p 46 

 

Just as Bill Wilson taught patience through pain, so too do the scriptures teach us to endure with faith and hope. 

"My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness."  2 Corinthians 12:9 

"Wherefore, e of good cheer, and do not fear, for I the Lord am with you and will stand by you." (Doctrine and Covenants 68"6) 

From the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I find the following thoughts. 

"Patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring.  It means staying with something and doing all that we can." Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf ("Continue n Patience") 

"The joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives."  President Russell M. Nelson, "Joy and spiritual Survival" 

Mindfulness in Action

 

“One of the great gifts of sobriety is learning to see beauty in things not always with the eyes, but with the feeling of the heart.”

–Shelley

Today’s one of those days — laundry waiting, calling family members not talked to in a while, bills to pay, and an afternoon shift at the AA Service Center. I caught myself thinking, “Where’s my time?”

But honestly, this is my time.

Giving back, showing up, doing the little things — that’s the kind of stuff that fills me up in ways I didn’t even know I needed. It feeds my spirit, and by the end of the day, it’s the kind of tired that feels good.

Kindness is never wasted. Maybe that’s what people mean when they say, “In God’s good time.” I’m starting to believe it.

“And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.”

—2 Corinthians 9:8

Hope today treats you kindly

Feeling God's Love, a Prayerful Journy

 

Last night I was hanging out on my church's website.  This being Holy Week or the week before Jesus Christ was crucified, entombed and rose from the dead, there was a worksheet available to record "Greater Love" for each day of the week.  Being curious, I downloaded the journal-like worksheet and attempted to complete the journal for Palm Sunday.    

  

The question asked was: "What did you feel as you prayed to know how your Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ feel about you?  What does this feeling motivate you to do for others?"  

   

I was caught very much off guard. True fact, I had never asked God or Christ their opinion of me before.  I have prayed for people, places and things and to know God's will, but to ask for an opinion about me, it seems too prideful.  I needed to take several attempts to just get the words out.  Then it was also necessary to be calm and silent enough to allow for a response.    

As I remained still, I experienced the following feelings.  

• My first feeling was one of being ok.  Then as I continued to pray, had a strong feeling of love, acceptance and approval for the things I am doing, volunteer work, charity and loving my neighbor.  There was a sense of acknowledgement and that I am on the right path. 

• The thought came that even though I had come a long way since getting sober, I still needed to preserver and complete the course.   

• I had the feeling that the room was just a little brighter.  This seem strange since my eyes were closed and I am completely blind in one eye.  Yet, I was experiencing this sensation with both eyes. 

• Finally, I felt a warmness.  This sensation brought me physically to a level of tears.  I retain that feeling a little even now.   

The next request by the journal was to provide what motivations I may have through this experience.  

This is what I have written:   

• This lesson inspires me to share it with others so they might gain the same feelings. 

• I am encouraged to do more service and show greater kindness than I have before.  

• I want to incorporate parts of this prayer into my daily prayers.  Hopefully it will carry the same message of humility and sincerity as before. 

"If there is a greater lesson here, it is this: 
Our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ desire a loving, personal relationship with each of us — not just for today, but for all eternity. 
All we need to do is ask, with an open heart and mind." 

A side note: Recognizing Spiritual Experiences     "Sometimes, spiritual experiences are quiet and unexpected, like this one. They are often marked by a deep sense of peace, love, and a gentle nudge toward goodness. They bring lasting feelings of hope, humility, and connection with God. A true spiritual experience will align with what we know of God's love and teachings. It will inspire us to be better, kinder, and more faithful. If you ever wonder whether a moment is spiritual, listen to your heart and soul — the Spirit testifies quietly but powerfully when we are touched by Heaven."

Living the Teachings of Jesus Christ: Growing in Confidence Before God

 

When President Russell M. Nelson spoke in the April 2025 General Conference, his message stirred my heart. He taught that true confidence—the kind that matters most—is not rooted in worldly success or self-esteem but in our relationship with God.

He quoted the powerful words from Doctrine and Covenants 121:45:

"Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God."

That phrase stayed with me: "then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God."
What a beautiful promise! Confidence not from pride, but from purity. Not from achievement, but from becoming like Him.

As I reflected on this teaching, I felt inspired to outline a path for living the teachings of Jesus Christ more fully. It’s simple, but like all things from heaven, it carries power when lived intentionally.

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1. Build on a Sure Foundation

Everything begins with faith in Jesus Christ.
Each day, renew your belief in Him as the Son of God and your personal Savior.
Nurture that faith with prayer and sincere study of the scriptures. Listen for the gentle whisperings of the Holy Ghost guiding your steps.

Christ is the cornerstone. Without Him, we build on sand. With Him, we are unshakable.

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2. Let Charity and Virtue Fill Your Soul

Charity is more than kindness — it is the pure love of Christ.
It means loving the unlovable, forgiving the unforgivable, and reaching out when it’s inconvenient.

Virtue means choosing to think, watch, read, and say things that are clean and holy. It means guarding our thoughts as much as our actions.

As President Nelson taught, if we let charity and virtue fill our lives, our confidence before God grows naturally. It is His Spirit changing our hearts from the inside out.

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3. Make and Keep Sacred Covenants

Covenants anchor us to Christ.
Through baptism, sacrament, and temple covenants, we bind ourselves to Him — and He binds Himself to us.

Each time we renew our covenants, especially through temple worship, we invite more of His power and peace into our lives.
Keeping covenants is not about being perfect; it’s about striving with sincerity and trusting in His grace when we fall short.

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4. Stand in Confidence Before God

Confidence before God is different from worldly confidence.
It means praying boldly, trusting that He hears you and knows you. It means approaching Him without fear, knowing you are striving to live as He asks.

It means feeling peace in your soul, even when storms rage around you, because you know you are His.

This confidence comes one day at a time, one prayer at a time, one choice at a time.

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5. Walk the Daily Path of Discipleship

Following Christ is not a grand event — it’s a daily journey.

• Begin each morning with a prayer for charity and clean thoughts.

• Spend a few minutes in His words each day, even if it’s just one verse.

• Seek quiet ways to serve, not for recognition but out of love.

• Repent quickly. Smile often. Trust fully.

Small things, consistently done, transform hearts over time.

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6. The End Goal: Becoming Like Him

At the end of this journey, the goal is not to have lived a "perfect" life.
It is to have become like Jesus Christ.

To be filled with His love.
To have His image in your countenance.
To stand before God not trembling, but joyful — confident because you know Him, and He knows you.

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Final Thought

The Savior gently invites us:

"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

Living His teachings is the surest path to peace, power, and true confidence.
Not the fleeting kind the world offers, but the eternal kind that grows stronger with every step toward Him.

Let us strive to live His way — full of charity, virtue, faith, and joyful confidence in the presence of our Heavenly Father.

In the name of Jesus Christ.  Amen

🌟

Wisdom and Necessity

 

Many years ago, I was diving off the Channel Islands along the California coast. My dive buddy and I were exploring the majestic, cathedral-like kelp forests about 100 feet below the surface. At that depth, my air supply was quickly running low. I caught the attention of my buddy, signaled that I was out of air, and began heading for the surface.

Three critical actions from my dive training came instantly to mind:

• Relax and do not waste air while rising to the surface.

• Ask to share the air available with my buddy, who was also running low.

• Recall a training exercise in a dive tank where, as you rise, air naturally moves from your body into your lungs due to the change in pressure.

That moment was intense—but those simple, practiced steps helped me get safely back to the surface.

So why share this story today, when I'm no longer diving?

Because the 12 Steps of AA—and recovery itself—work in a very similar way.

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Lessons for Recovery

• Know when daily life overwhelms you that you have options based on tested wisdom.
  There are principles that have saved lives countless times before. Trust them.

• Share your feelings with another alcoholic and, where possible, ask for help.
  Your friend may have just the air you need to breathe today.

• Rely with faith on time-tested knowledge.
  As you continue to rise through the fathoms of your dilemma, your Higher Power will supply life-saving oxygen—sometimes from sources you’re not even aware of yet.

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Wisdom Passed Down

I also want to share a few pieces of wisdom that tie all of this together, both from scripture and from the literature many of us have leaned on in recovery:

"Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good." — Book of Mormon, Alma 37:37

"God is in His heavens. He knows your prayers. He is aware of your needs. He will help you as you call upon Him." — Gordon B. Hinckley

"Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it." — J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

"Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow." — Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." — Jeremiah 29:11

"For behold, the Spirit of Christ is given to every man, that he may know good from evil." — Moroni 7:16

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A Closing Thought

I invite you to reflect on how wisdom found through hard times can become the life-saving breath you’ll need in times of necessity.

You are not alone. You have a Higher Power who knows you. And you have friends who, like a good dive buddy, will share their air when you need it most.

Stay close to the wisdom that saves. Trust the tested principles. And keep rising.

Good Morning.